Cindy turned and looked out the window at the stalls of merchandise and quick food lined up on the streets. It was past lunch time and she was hungry.
“Sorry to have gotten in your way,” she said.
He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. “What are you really doing here, Cindy?” he asked.
Cindy was startled. Did he suspect her of something? Did he think she had an ulterior motive?
“I told you,” she said. “It’s really just as simple as that.”
“These things are never as simple as that,” he said. “No one takes a trip down here and puts themselves in danger to help an old friend. Even for pay, I don’t buy it. ”
They stared at each other for a long moment. Cindy was being forced to look deeper into what drove her down, back to the Caribbean. The thought of Clint rose up in her mind, to their time together down here on their honeymoon, and the horrible way he’d been pulled away from her, before they’d even had a chance to start their new lives. Her eyes filled with tears. Was her trip down here a way to relive what happened with him? To rescue him? Was it a way to stay connected? Was it comforting to going through it all over again, with Dalia?
“It meant a lot to me that I solved Clint’s murder,” she said quietly.
Mattheus took a deep breath. “I can imagine,” he said, in a softer tone. “And, clearly, you still haven’t let the whole thing go.”
The idea of just letting it all go was deeply disturbing to her.
“It’s so new,” Cindy said, “it just happened months ago.”
“So, think about it, Cindy. Maybe you’re looking for a way to join Clint now? Lots of people put themselves into danger or get sick after someone they loved dies. It’s a fact. ”
Mattheus kept surprising Cindy. She wondered how he knew so much.
“I’m not trying to get myself killed,” Cindy said, “if that’s what you’re implying.”
“Maybe not consciously,” Mattheus said, “but plenty of people come down here sick of life, trying to do themselves in. In one way or another. ”
Cindy wondered if that included him, too.
“You’re in the wrong profession,” she said to him. “You’re a natural psychologist, you know.”
He laughed at that. “That’s the last thing in the world I’d like to do.”
His laugh was contagious and she joined in, releasing a lot of the tension between them.
“Well, maybe you’re running away from your true calling,” she said lightly. It was her turn to be the psychologist now.
“Nah,” he grinned, “I’m happy right where I am. Come on, let’s get out of the car and a bite, before I meet up with Sand. ”
*
Cindy was relieved to get out of the car, even though it was hot and humid. Walking along the crowded streets, they were jostled back and forth. This small village was dilapidated, with small one-room shacks as houses, and unclothed children packing the streets, sharing space with wild chickens on the dirt roads.
Mattheus led her to a side road, and into a dingy restaurant with tables, wobbly chairs and a wall fan. “This place looks terrible, but the food’s fresh. And Sand will meet me here when he’s done. ”
“It’s fine,” said Cindy.
“You’re a good sport,” Mattheus said. “I like that.”
“That’s something, anyway,” said Cindy.
Mattheus laughed. “It’s more than something. But, if you want my advice, get off this island as soon as you can. ”
Cindy felt as though a strong wind had come and slapped her in the face again. The idea of running away from a job, half finished, wasn’t something she could live with. And even if she did, where would she go? The idea of going home now, back into the life she’d had before this all happened, was impossible. It made her feel restless and sad.
“Thanks for the advice,” said Cindy, as the waiter came to take their order, “but I’m not a quitter.”
Mattheus looked stunned. “This case could take years,” he said. “The odds are it will never be solved.” Then he turned to the waiter. “The usual,” he said.
“If you knew how many crimes happened down on these islands that never get solved –” he went on.
“I don’t base my actions on statistics,” Cindy said. “I live with hope.”
Mattheus was silenced for a second. “No one said you shouldn’t have hope. How about hope mixed with facts? ”
The moment he said that, an awareness struck Cindy, like lightning. She suddenly realized why she was needed on the case. The facts for Mattheus were one thing, while for Cindy they were something else. Each person found their own set of facts, based upon the way they saw the world, and what they wanted from it.
“Every fact doesn’t reveal itself to every person,” she said. “No matter how well trained they are.”
Mattheus seemed to like that. “True.”
“I know you’d like me to leave for my own good,” Cindy said, “and I thank you for that. But I have no intention of going anywhere. ”
“You’re one tough lady,” Mattheus said.
“I came down to do a job.”
“For a second you reminded me of Elizabeth,” Mattheus said.