Cindy picked up her speed and ran faster to break into the chain of memories that tried to bind her. Images of Sean arose as well. He was interesting to Cindy, both a cop and lawyer that she’d just met in Anguilla. Sean had wanted so badly to return to New York with her to help. Not only was it unnecessary, Cindy had no true idea about who Sean was, or her real feelings towards him. He’d been a wonderful support on the last case, someone she’d truly needed at the time. But, one’s needs became skewed when hunting for a murderer. Strong feelings developed that had little to do with normal times. And, what about now? Cindy was about to enter a new world. If she took the job at the paper, she would have different needs and there would be different kinds of people to interact with. Sean was essentially a wanderer, life in the States could feel confining to him. In the same way, life here would certainly be confining to Mattheus, Cindy thought.
Cindy ran faster, trying to wipe away these relentless thoughts. She couldn’t though. Being a detective was wonderful but also unsettling. As soon as one case was over, the next was right over the hill. These cases had a way of drawing you in, too. It was hard to think of anything else while tracking down a killer. It became an obsession until justice had been served. Being on the hunt like that snatched away both your time and personal concerns. Cindy thought of Mattheus now absorbed in protecting his daughter and her mother from danger. In a situation like that, how could he possibly have time to think about her?
Cindy realized it was time to take a new direction. It was time for her to develop new skills, become a voice to be contended with, a person of influence. Cindy had never seen herself that way, but somehow she felt ready for it now. If she took the job at the paper and settled down, she could easily find someone stable to remarry and build the family she’d always wanted so much. Then she could also spend more time with her family, and build friendships she could count upon. It seemed a smart direction to go in.
Cindy reached the end of the coastline, turned around and began to run back. An older man with a lame dog was walking towards her along the water’s edge. Cindy jogged past him, not meeting his
eyes. Who exactly was coming to visit her this afternoon, she wondered? Probably the women from the book club Cindy had known when she lived in town. Cindy didn’t expect or want to see Clint’s family again right now.
A light drizzle started as Cindy’s jog came to an end. She enjoyed the soft rain dropping on her face. Spring was like that, thought Cindy, misty, foggy days and then suddenly, bright sun.
*
Cindy returned home calmer, steadier and invigorated. Her head was clear. She would call the paper and accept the job in a little while, after her guests had visited. First, she wanted to take a warm bath and dress for the afternoon.
Cindy dressed for the afternoon in a cheerful lemon print dress and sandals. Then she put the finger sandwiches, salad and lemonade Ann had prepared on the coffee table in the living room. Ann had to be in Bermuda by now, luxuriating on the beautiful beaches and Cindy was happy for her.
Before Cindy had even finished putting the food out, the doorbell rang. Cindy went to the door, opened it. Alana and Jewel stood there together, eager to welcome her home. Both were friends from the book club, as Cindy had guessed.
“So good to see you, so good!” they said at the same time.
“Thanks for coming, come in,” Cindy responded brightly, actually happy to see them again. They all sat down to catch up as the bell rang again.
Cindy ran to open it and saw Tina and Barbara, two of Clint’s dear friends, who entered and joined the festive atmosphere.
“This is it? You’re returning for good?” Tina asked brightly.
“Looks like it,” Cindy smiled.
Jewel raised her eyebrows. “Quite a change of life style, isn’t it?” she said. “Hope you won’t find it boring here. Our book club will never provide the excitement you’re used to.”
Cindy thought of the new job waiting for her, though she didn’t say anything about it as yet. “It won’t be boring here,” Cindy assured both Jewel and herself.
Alana laughed. “If you’re not boring, your life is not boring,” she chimed in. “I’m sure Cindy will find something wonderful to do and keep us all hopping.”
“Definitely,” Jewel agreed, biting into her second sandwich. “These sandwiches are delicious. Did Ann prepare them?”
“Naturally,” Cindy smiled. “I’m not the fabulous homemaker she is.”
“Not yet anyway,” Tina laughed, “once you settle down, who knows what will happen?”
“Where’s Ann anyway?” asked Alana, looking around for Ann who had become a familiar fixture in all of their lives.
“She’s down in Bermuda with Frank,” said Cindy. “Vacation time.”
“We could all use some of that,” Alana was impressed.
The afternoon passed easily with light conversation. The women were curious about Cindy’s life and while she mentioned nothing about her relationship with Mattheus, Cindy did fill them in about a day in the life of a detective, keeping them riveted to their chairs. Before they all knew it, a few hours had passed and it was time for them to go. Children were waiting back home, dinners had to be prepared.
“I have no idea where the hours went,” said Jewel as they all got up to leave and unexpectedly the doorbell rang.
“Oh my God,” said Alana, “a late comer! Now you have to start your wonderful stories all over again.”