Dear Aaron

To: [email protected]

Subject: RE: Toast and Superman



Aaron,

Still there?



I walked downstairs twice today. That’s an improvement. I’ve had two pieces of toast with butter and some chunkier soup. Happy? :)



I’ll make sure to leave a note in my imaginary will that someone in my family keep sending you pizza materials in the case of my demise.



…I was being vague on purpose. How you could tell through a message is a little amazing, to be honest. I don’t usually tell everyone about my health, but that’s only because I worry people will react the same way my family does, and like I said, it isn’t that it isn’t great but… I sound like a whiney baby. I had a heart disorder. I had surgery for it a few years ago. I’m fine now. :)



Superman versus Jesus. I’ve never paired them up. (It’s blasphemy, but Superman would win, wouldn’t he?) My brother told me when he’d have trouble falling asleep, he’d stay up counting all the aircraft that flew over the camp. Have you done that before?



All my designs on my own were moved back or canceled. You should have read some of the rude messages I got from a few of the skating moms that were “understanding.” You’d figure that I intentionally got sick and wanted to miss out on making money. My alteration work through the dry cleaner had to go through someone else, and my aunt with the bridal shop… she chewed me out. I’m trying really hard not to think about how much money I lost, but it’s hard and it makes me panic. I felt really bad about letting everyone down. When I give someone my word, I try to keep it.



Thank you for the pics of Ax. I’m going to print out the one of her on top of the big tractor tire and frame it. It’s beautiful.



Hope the mosquitoes and mice are treating you well. :)



-Ruby



P.S. I put butter. Real butter, not the fake stuff. Good?





From: [email protected]

Date: February 8, 2009 12:45 p.m.

To: [email protected]

Subject: Sometimes I wonder



Ruby,

Still here….



You’re being vague again, Rube. A heart disorder and you had surgery? If that’s all you want to tell me, it’s all right. I know it isn’t my business. But if you do want to tell me, I’d like to know. I searched for heart problems and there’s… a lot of them. Kind of wish I wouldn’t have done that now.



At this point, I hope you’ve walked further than just downstairs and eaten more than soup. The Internet was down for a little while and we got sent out on a patrol.



Make sure whoever inherits me sends books too.



^^^You know I’m messing with you, yeah?



Superman all the way… but some guys put up some good points on Jesus to be fair. We’re both going down if it’s blasphemy. Down, get it? Heh.



The aircrafts constantly going over the camp is unreal. You have to learn to zone them out, otherwise you’d never stop counting them or get sleep. They’re always there. Literally always.



Do you have money saved? Can you borrow some from your family if you needed? Tell those moms to leave you alone. If you cough all over their dresses, you’ll get their kids sick… then they can’t skate. Your aunt has no business giving you hell over not being able to work on dresses for her. Didn’t you say she already makes you do a lot more than you should?



I’m keeping the mosquitoes fed and Ax is keeping the mice away. She tries to play with them.



-Aaron



P.S. Stress isn’t good for you recovering. Just saying.





From: [email protected]

Date: February 9, 2009 11:11 p.m.

To: [email protected]

Subject: How did you do tours without my e-mails? Kidding.



Aaron,

I’m sorry for not telling you everything. It’s a touchy subject. I guess I just didn’t want you to think of me any differently. Not that you would, but… I’m sorry. I had no right to expect that. If you were the one who’d had surgery, I would want to know everything too.



Here’s the story. I used to get dizzy and lightheaded when I was younger, and my heart would start beating really fast. I didn’t say anything for a while. Young and dumb, I know you know what I mean. :) I finally told my mom one day about it, and they took me to the doctor and did some tests. You’re not supposed to feel that way when you’re a kid, apparently. It turned out I have this syndrome called Wolff-Parkinson-White. To make a long story short, I had an extra electrical pathway between the upper and lower chambers of my heart. There’s a node that’s bypassed because of the pathway and it caused my heart to beat fast. I took a beta blocker for a while to deal with it, but a few years ago, I had surgery to fix it. Everything went fine. I’m okay. I should be okay from now on. My mom blamed herself for not knowing. Remember I told you her mom died before I was born? She had sudden cardiac death and the doctors think she might have had the same thing as me and never got treated for it. That’s why they all freak out over my health, even if it isn’t anything to do with the old ticker.



I hope you didn’t fall asleep reading that.



My mom and her husband have been taking turns coming home on their lunch break to check on me. I swear she takes better care of me now than she did when I was little (before my heart thing). She’d make me go to school even if I had something contagious back then. You’ll be happy to know I made it through a grocery shopping trip and only felt like dying the last half of it.



Pizzas and books. You got it. All romance. Lol.



(I know you’re messing with me. I think you’d miss me for the rest of your deployment if I wasn’t around, see the subject line.)



I guess the aircrafts don’t ever let you forget where you are, huh?



I have some money saved. I’ve been reinvesting most of it into ads in magazines and a couple of websites, and more expensive materials to work on. If I needed money bad enough, I could ask my mom or oldest brother, Sebastian. They’d let me borrow it with only a few snarky comments. The rude parents I can handle, but my aunt with the bridal shop is a different story. I got a voice mail from her the day before yesterday that made me cry. I couldn’t tell my mom or my dad (his sister) because they would’ve lost it. She pretty much told me she was going to be broke this month because I hadn’t finished the dresses she needed. I feel bad, but it wasn’t like I got sick on purpose.



I just thought about it, can’t you get malaria from mosquitoes?



Have you heard from your friends lately?



I want to ask about your leave, but since you haven’t brought it up again, I’m worried it didn’t work out.



-Ruby



P.S. I’m eating more. I’ve gained three pounds back.



P.P.S While I’ve been busy coming back from the brink of death, I started signing up for this dating website. I haven’t hit publish on my profile, but I will soon. Baby steps.



P.P.P.S. Sorry for being such a Debbie Downer this e-mail.





From: [email protected]

Date: February 14, 2009 4:17 a.m.

To: [email protected]

Subject: We’ll go with that.



Ruby,

You know your heart is the most important part of your body, don’t you? I get why you didn’t want to tell me, but I’m not going to treat you any different. Mostly :] I get your family being overprotective even more now. Your grandma dying from a heart problem doesn’t help anything either. What kind of surgery did you have to fix it?



Were you faking being sick when you were a kid and that’s why she made you go to school? Or did you genuinely feel bad?



I got this feeling I’d miss your e-mails even if I wasn’t on deployment.



No, you never forget where you are with Apaches flying overhead at all hours of the day.