We were silent for a moment. “And the other reason for your scowl?”
Dinner arrives in grand fashion. The orchestrated way the waiters show up with the meal and place it before us interrupts his answer. Steam billows from the plates as I smile at the waiter before he leaves.
Andy doesn’t immediately dig into his food. We are warned it’s piping hot.
“The other reason for my scowl is my buddy is an equal opportunist when it comes to dating and he doesn’t hide it, especially now. So I spent the night getting congratulations regarding the upholding of the 14th amendment that passed several months ago.” He pauses and gauges my reaction. I smile and don’t show the skip of my heartbeat. He continues. “There were reporters and I spent the whole night dodging flashing cameras. And not because I don’t agree with the ruling, but because I don’t want to have to explain my sexual orientation to my colleagues.”
I manage a laugh and finally he laughs too. We eat and our conversation lightens. He tells me stories of his friend’s antics. Dinner turns out okay. I pass on desert because I’m stuffed. I have to swat his hand away when the check arrives, but he finally lets me pay. After all, I am the one who invited him on the date.
“I know you have to work tomorrow. But can I take you somewhere?”
I don’t expect it. Despite the tension loosening, we haven’t exactly patched things up. We’ve avoided all talk of our relationship during the rest of the meal.
“Sure. Can you tell me where?”
When the valet pulls his car up to the curb, he just grins while walking to the driver’s side. He does like his surprises. When he pulls up on Constitution Avenue where the lights are strung up between lamps, it doesn’t dawn on me where he’s taking me until we walk to the ticket booth. A lone figure waits and Andy checks his watch.
“I have a reservation.”
“Yes. Drew?”
Andy nods.
“Follow me.”
We walk through the gate and I can’t believe my eyes. They begin to mist, overcome with emotions.
He stops at a bench and takes my gloved hands. “I know this is hard for you.” He glances up to the sky before meeting my gaze. I wipe at the corners of my eyes. “I want this to work and ignoring the past isn’t working. We have to confront it.”
“I’m not sure I can.” My voice breaks, but he’s right. We can’t ignore it. “There’s no one here,” I say.
“Just because we need this, doesn’t mean you have to do it with an audience. I’ve booked this time only for us. You and me.”
In every other circumstance this would be a swoon worthy moment, a romantic gesture that can be told to future grandchildren. Instead, I try my best to keep the tears at bay. We put on our shoes that wait for us because he’s thought of everything. I realize he preplanned this as he holds out his hand to me.
“It’s time to take the first step. Will you take it with me?”
I stare at the rink and all it represents. And I know if I can’t trust him and walk onto the ice, it will never work between us. I gaze into his willing eyes and at his open hand.
CHRISTMAS BREAK. DREW. IT’S MORE than difficult to keep my mind on studying, but I have to. I’m almost done with finals and I need to pull this off. I’m counting on a 4.0 this semester so my head needs to be in the game. Drew acts like my coach, texting me encouraging messages every few hours. I wish he’d send me naked pictures instead. Not really. I’d never get anything accomplished if he did.
My last exam is this Friday afternoon and then I’m headed to Indy to stay with him for six days until we fly home. We’re on the same flight, which will be nice. He can only stay in Charleston three days, but I’ll be there for a week. I’ll return to Indy and spend another week with him before I have to go back to Purdue. This will be the most time we’ve ever spent with each other and even though the excitement is killing me, it also has me biting my nails. This could be one of those make it or break it things. All of our weekends together have always been like vacations, but this will be more of the real thing.
Shoving those thoughts away, I refocus on my accounting. This exam is supposed to be a ball buster so I pour another cup of coffee and hit the books. Jenna is in the library so the apartment is as quiet as a church on Monday. I stay at it until two a.m., when I hear the lock turn.
“You still up?”
“Yeah,” I say, stretching and rubbing my eyes. “I’m just about to call it a night.”
“I had to do the same when my lids started slamming shut. My 5 Hour Energy wore off long ago,” Jenna claims. “I’m beat. Thank god my exam isn’t until ten-thirty.”
“Yeah. Mine’s not until noon. That’ll give me a couple of review hours. And then Finance on Friday and voila! I can’t wait to be done.”
“You can’t wait to get into Drew’s bed.”
“Well, there is that. But I’m so over studying. I want a break.”
“There is truth in that,” she says.