She gathered her failing reserve, removing her hand to her side before getting to her feet. He reached out, taking her hand, but she jerked it from his grasp.
“You bastard. You’re surrounded with a freaking smorgasbord of women.” She gave a bitter laugh. “I wondered which ones you had been with. I never thought you had been with them all. That you shared them all!”
Her hand swung out, slamming into the side of his face. “You fucked me with no condom!”
“You’re the only one I haven’t used a condom with; it’s a hard rule here. We also have regular blood work done. We’re not irresponsible.” Cash’s face hardened as he rose to his feet.
Rachel backed away from him, refusing to cry. She wasn’t hurt; she didn’t care about him anymore. This had merely confirmed everything she’d already known—they had no chance together.
When Cheryl paled and sat up straight on Rider’s lap, she realized she had been screaming at Cash.
“Did you get a laugh when you saw how I was dressed tonight? How lame I was? I hate you…” A broken sob escaped her.
Humiliated, she ran from the room before Cash could stop her, running down the long flight of steps and nearly falling in her heels before she tore them off and threw them at Cash as he chased after her. He almost caught up with her, but she darted between the bikers standing at the bottom of the steps, running into the woods before he could stop her.
“Rachel! Come back. I’ll take you home.”
Rachel ignored his yells, running through the forest as if a monster from Hell was after her.
*
Cash squatted down, reading the tracks on the ground. She wasn’t heading back to Mag’s house; she was heading home. He followed behind her as quick as he could, furious at himself that he hadn’t handled telling her the truth about the women better. Lily had warned him when Shade had told her the women’s punishment included not attending the party.
He had known Rachel would be furious. He had even figured that she would be hurt, but what he had witnessed had gone beyond what he had thought her reaction would be. He should have guarded the doors where she couldn’t get out. Now she was heading for her brothers’ home and would have an arsenal at her disposal.
He followed her trail until he found her not far from home. She was sitting under a tree, crying into the neck of her huge-ass dog. A loud growl alerted her to his presence.
“Go away, Cash. Please, just go away.”
Cash remained still. “I can’t, Rachel.” Slowly, despite the dog’s growl, he moved toward her, kneeling down in front of her then brushing her damp hair away from her cheek.
“I’m sorry that I’m an ass. I thought it would be easier for you to deal with if you saw it like it was.”
“Ripping a band-aid off?” she asked sarcastically.
Cash winced. “Yeah. I’m not going to lie and pretend I don’t like the life I lead, or that I live it because I’m fucked-up. I’m not. I like to fuck, and I like to fuck a lot. I like sex, the raunchier the better. I could have hidden it from you, pretended that part of my life never happened, but the truth would have eventually come out.”
Rachel buried her face back in the dog’s fur.
His hand slid to the back of her neck, lifting her face to his. “I haven’t fucked another woman since you saw me with Bliss.”
Her suspicious gaze didn’t shy away from his.
“It’s the truth. I haven’t really wanted anyone since I was with you at your house. I wasn’t ready to accept that you got under my skin, though. I like to say that your brothers are slow. The truth is, I was slow in admitting that it was more than just sex with you, Rachel. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you. I didn’t care if you wore a trench coat tonight, only that you were there, with me.”
“Go back.” She moved away from his touch. “I couldn’t ever do the things I saw there tonight. I wouldn’t want to.”
“I didn’t show you so that you would participate; I showed you because I didn’t want any secrets between us. I like the Friday parties, but if you don’t want to go, that’s cool.” Cash tried to make her see she had all the choices.
She raised her face from the neck of her dog. “Do Lily and Beth and the others?”
He wanted to respect their privacy, but he needed to tell Rachel the truth. “Yes. They found the part that they enjoy and leave the part they don’t alone. Tell the truth, Rachel. Be honest to both of us. Did you find the whole thing upsetting? There wasn’t one thing you found arousing?”
“No.”
Cash took hope that she sounded unsure. It was her first experience with their lifestyle. None of his brothers’ wives had taken it any better when they had found out.
“That’s okay,” he assured her, moving closer to her side and placing his arm around her shoulders. She still clung to her dog, but she sank against him, letting him hold her. He sat holding her quietly, letting her absorb everything she had learned.