Jagger glanced over at Arianne. “I know the feeling.”
Cade pushed his chair away from the table. “I never really dealt with all that guilt. I never thought it through, until I met Dawn. She made me see I got a need to protect the people I care about, and when I can’t, it eats at my soul.”
“Your sacrifice protected the club.”
“Yeah, and it put Dawn and her girls at risk.”
“You can’t protect everyone, brother. You can’t stop people from doing what they want to do or being where they want to be. And you can’t fight everyone’s fight. Sometimes it’s just enough that you’ve got your brother’s back so he knows he isn’t fighting alone.”
He felt the truth of Jagger’s words in his gut, and the burden he’d carried for so long lifted. His mother, his men … he’d done everything he could do to save them, but in the end, he couldn’t be responsible for their choices, or for the actions of the men who had destroyed them.
But now he had another chance. He could protect the woman he loved by destroying the destroyer before he caused any harm, and maybe then he could convince her to make another choice. The right choice.
Him.
TWENTY-ONE
I will never give in, never give up, never surrender.
SINNER’S TRIBE CREED
“Where is he?” Dawn stood on tiptoe as she tried to see above the sea of heads in front of her. The makeshift boxing ring in the backyard of the clubhouse, although illuminated by floodlights, was barely visible through the crowd, and despite the late hour, the fights were still going strong. The yard smelled of sweat and stale beer, crushed grass and the sweet scent of pot.
“He’s standing in the far corner.” Arianne pointed through the crowd, and Dawn caught a glimpse of golden hair. “He hasn’t fought yet. I think he was hoping you would show up.”
“He left a message with Banks asking me to come. I guess he wants to say good-bye. I feel awful for avoiding him, but I just didn’t know what to say.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re here. Usually these are fun fights. We invite a few support clubs and have a big party. But Cade challenged a guy from the Devil Dogs who is an amateur fighter on the MMA circuit with all sorts of wins under his belt. Cade’s good, but he doesn’t have a chance against a seasoned MMA fighter.”
“Christ. Look at this crowd.” T-Rex came up behind them, Tank at his side. “Sparky’s taking bets if you want to throw in some cash.” He winked at Arianne. “By the way, Jagger’s still on his way back from Helena. He said to enjoy yourself.”
“You texted him?”
“Thought he should know his old lady was in a dangerous place, but T-Rex and Tank had your back.” T-Rex held up his arm in a classic bodybuilder pose, his biceps flexing under his T-shirt, but Arianne didn’t smile.
“Like I can’t look after myself,” she snapped.
“Not sayin’ you can’t look after yourself,” T-Rex said. “Just sayin’ the Sinners always have your back.”
A cheer rose from the crowd, signaling the start of the match. Dawn stepped to the side until she had a clear view just as Cade stepped into the ring. His fight shorts, black with a white skull on each side, reminded her of his patch, but when he turned and she saw the scarred tattoo on his back, her heart squeezed in his chest.
“Oh. My. God.” Arianne’s hand flew to her mouth. “What happened to his tat?”
“Jimmy.”
“Goddamn bastard,” T-Rex growled behind them. “That damn Brethren election can’t happen too soon. Everyone’s fighting to be on the team that goes after Mad Dog.”
“I think you’ve put in enough time waiting for that election. And Cade suffered for it.” She surprised herself with the sharpness of her tone, or the spark of defiance that wasn’t appropriate for a soon-to-be ex-old-lady.
Arianne gestured to the ring, defusing the tension that had curled around them. “Cade’s ready to fight. Nick is referee tonight, and he just gave the thumbs-up.”
Cade nodded at Nick, then looked out into the crowd. She knew the moment he saw her, felt the burning intensity of his gaze as he searched her face. His unspoken question was clear. But she had no answer to give him, except in that instant, she knew with absolute certainty she wanted him more than any man she’d ever wanted before.
Nick tapped Cade on the shoulder and he turned his attention to his opponent, now standing in the center of the ring.
Taller than Cade by about two inches, broader and more muscular, the Devil Dog wore a black bandanna and sported two silver earrings in his right ear. With a chest full of tats, he looked like a pirate, save for the Devil Dog patch on his back.