Shane gave Michael a grateful nod, taking some small comfort in the knowledge that his brother was doing everything he could to make it easier, for all of them. He was overseeing Lacie’s care, ensuring that she was comfortable while her body healed and re-adjusted. “Thanks,” he said, his voice sounding like sandpaper over glass.
Michael nodded. Kieran came through the door, the look on his face unreadable. Shane realized he hadn’t seen much of the youngest Callaghan over the past two days. Then again, he hadn’t been able to think about much of anything besides Lacie. His brothers, as always, had his back.
“How is Lacie?” Kieran asked immediately.
“Better than expected. Rebecca’s with her now,” Michael answered. “Where’s Davidson?”
Kieran’s eyes blazed the signature blue flames they all had in common. “Dead. Fucker somehow managed to off himself with a shiv he’d concealed. Messy as hell, though.”
“Saves us the trouble,” Kane said, his eyes cold and deadly. It was true enough. They hadn’t reached a consensus on exactly what they were going to do with him once Lacie was safe. They would have preferred to handle it amongst themselves – Shane in particular – but back in Pine Ridge the police were already involved and it might prove to be rather tricky. Davidson’s suicide tied off more than a few loose ends, if nothing else.
Shane’s eyes glowed with the fury of being denied his vengeance, but he had more important things to think about.
“You take care of it?” Kane asked, his voice sharp and cold. Kieran nodded. Kane grunted in approval – the closest he came to praise – and the youngest Callaghan beamed.
Rebecca had left a sandwich and some soup for him, but Shane couldn’t stomach it. Not when it was tied in so many knots. Yes, Lacie was here. Yes, she was safe. But he had come so close to losing her, and that had left him badly shaken. Shaken and filled with a sense of rage so hot it threatened to consume him from the inside out.
Michael watched him carefully as he sat at the kitchen table, looking weary and angry and scared and in love. “We think we’re so tough, so strong,” he said quietly. Kane, polishing his guns in the living area, paused momentarily in his stroke, but didn’t look up. “We train hard, spend hours, days, weeks in places no man should have to go, enduring all kinds of shit because life is so fucked up and people can be so unbelievably cruel to each other. And we’re so smug, because we’re above all that, and we’re the best at what we do. The fucking good guys.”
He paused and took a deep breath. “Then we find someone. Not just anyone, but the one we know we’re meant to spend the rest of our lives with. The one we simply cannot live without. And we finally know what real terror is. We finally feel the pain and hurt and suffering that we thought we understood before and realize we didn’t have a fucking clue.”
Shane looked up from the table, knowing Michael was speaking from his own experiences. Yet it applied to all of them. Kane’s eyes never left the gun as he rubbed the same spot over and over again. He, too, knew the truth of Michael’s words, and was no doubt remembering scarier times when his wife had been brutally attacked in the shelter at which she volunteered.
“But somehow, we get through it. And it makes us stronger, and we’re better men for it. Because now we really and truly understand. We get it. And it makes each day so much better than the last.”
No one spoke. Michael rose from his seat and paused by Shane to place a hand on his shoulder, then proceeded out to the porch, probably to call his wife, Maggie.
Like Shane, Michael was generally quiet by nature. Extremely intelligent with a special gift for healing. Definitely not prone to offer unsolicited wisdom or truths, but maybe this was a form of healing, too.
Shane sighed. Everything Michael said was true. Would he be a better man for it? He didn’t know. He did know that Lacie made him a better man, though. She filled a part of him he hadn’t even realized had been empty. To Shane, she was hope and love, comfort and home.
They would get through this. Somehow. Together. Because if there was one thing Shane knew for certain, it was that he would never, ever be without her again. He wanted to marry her, have a family with her, and spend the rest of their days getting the most out of life together. As long as they were together, they could handle anything life threw at them. Even this.
Was it a test? Or was it God’s way of revealing the truth to them? Being raised as an Irish Catholic had certainly shaped a big part of his life. He might not be a regular at Sunday Mass. He hadn’t been to confession since he left parochial school for public high school. But he never doubted in a higher power. Not once. Except maybe for a few brief seconds when Lacie lay lifeless in that bedroom while Michael pounded on her chest and Shane breathed his life breath into her lungs. And in those few moments when he was afraid he had lost his croie and possibly a child they had created - he had thoughts he was now acutely ashamed of.