Beneath the Shadows

Claire smiled, but Meredith didn’t as she looked across at her daughter. Claire briefly raised her eyebrows and returned her attention to her meal.

Meredith observed Grace thoughtfully for a moment. ‘Well, you have done a brave thing coming back here. I didn’t think you would. It’s not an easy place to be with a small baby, especially in winter, what with the snow causing all sorts of chaos.’ She took another bite of her lunch, leaving the comment hanging, so that Grace felt obliged to reply.

‘I wanted to sort through the cottage myself, not leave it to a stranger. Whatever else, I feel I owe Adam that much, for Millie’s sake.’

‘Besides, Mum, you raised a family out here,’ Claire added.

‘Yes, Claire,’ Meredith replied. ‘But I’ve lived here all my life. It’s different.’

Grace wondered what she meant by that. Was Meredith implying that Grace might have problems adapting to life in the sleepy village? Or was there something troubling about the area itself? Because Grace was already finding the unbroken silence unnerving, the way nothing moved except at the will of the wind – but she kept telling herself that she would get used to it.

Now Claire was speaking to her. ‘So there’s been no word then – about Adam?’

His name hung heavily in the space between them all. Claire’s face was filled with concern, and Grace noticed out of the corner of her eye that Annabel was casting her sister a worried glance.

‘No,’ Grace said, breathing deeply. ‘The police have filed him away as a missing person … but, I don’t know … I can’t believe that he just walked out … Oh, I’m sorry, do you mind if we don’t talk about it?’ She could feel her breath tightening in her chest.

Annabel cut in. ‘So, Meredith … when you say you’ve lived here all your life, you surely don’t mean in this house?’

‘I do indeed,’ Meredith replied. ‘All my life. My grandfather built the original house, and my parents added various extensions to make it what you see today. When my father was a young man, Roseby was very different. There was a brickworks operating a few hundred yards from here, and there were more small tenements. Most have fallen down – there are only three left, ramshackle now, you’ve probably seen them from the road. When the brickworks closed, everyone left. There weren’t enough children to need a school, so the area went wild again. Just a few families stuck it out.’

‘Don’t you find it isolated?’ Annabel asked.

Meredith shrugged. ‘This house contains so many memories, it’s never occurred to me to leave. I belong here.’

Annabel glanced at Grace.

‘Don’t judge us too hastily, Annabel,’ Meredith said, laying her knife and fork slowly to rest on the edges of her plate. She interlaced her fingers and propped her chin on her hands, looking from Annabel to Grace. ‘I can honestly say I have never seen anywhere as beautiful as it is here. Desolate, yes, particularly in winter, but watch it come alive in spring when the lambs are born and all the birds return from their migration. And it’s glorious when the heather crowns it in the autumn. This place has more life to it in one square metre than there is in a square mile of the concrete sprawl so many of you are keen to call home nowadays.’

Annabel raised her hands. ‘I think you’ve misunderstood. I’m a journalist. I’m instinctively curious, that’s all.’ But Grace knew what Annabel had been trying to convey with her eyes. She belongs here, Grace. You don’t.

There was an uncomfortable pause, then Claire said, ‘Our dad was a farmer. My sisters and I grew up playing in the ruins of the workers’ houses and the remains of the brickworks. It was fantastic – like having our own little make-believe village to run around in.’

‘Then they used them to hide in while they drank and smoked their way through their teenage years,’ Meredith added, a glimmer in her eye as she glanced at her daughter.

‘If you say so.’ Claire laughed. ‘Did Adam never tell you about them, Grace? He joined in for a while, in the few months he was here. He was a big hit with us all, I can tell you – new blood around here is extremely rare …’

Meredith’s eyes lingered on her daughter for a moment, then she looked down at her plate. ‘Remember that he was only here for a short time, Claire. It might not have felt like a big part of his life, not in the same way you remember it.’