Numbly, I watched as she arranged disinfectant and gauze on the bed. “Just past nine thirty.”
I shot up, a spike of fear-fueled adrenaline bringing me fully awake. “I’m late!”
“Shhh.” Ashley placed her hands on my shoulders and pushed me back to a reclining position. “You’re not late. You’re sleeping in.”
I frowned at her, at the unfamiliar room, and then the events of the prior evening crashed over me and I winced, my arms instinctively wrapping around myself.
After the unpleasantness with Cletus, Billy had carried me to a bedroom. I surmised it was Ashley’s old room because pictures of her with other people dotted the surfaces, the single bed was covered in a floral quilt, and the letters A S H L E Y hung on the wall.
Last night Billy had set me on the bed and placed a hand on my back; I curled into ball and covered my face with my hands, willing the tears to stop. I couldn’t think, because if I thought about anything, I would have to feel something. I wasn’t ready. So I cleared my mind, pictured a field covered in white snow.
Eventually the tears stopped. And when they did, I drifted into a dreamless sleep, until Ashley woke me.
“That’s right,” I said, remembering, “I have nowhere to be.” And I have nowhere to go.
Ashley moved to the end of the bed and began dabbing at my soles.
“They did a good job,” she mumbled, peeling off a Band-Aid.
“What’s that?”
Her eyes flickered to mine and she gave me a warm smile. “Billy and Beau. They did a good job cleaning your feet and trying to tape them up.”
When I continued regarding her with confusion, she added, “Billy called me. He was worried because you didn’t seem to notice them fussing with your feet. Said you just stared into space and didn’t respond.”
A mild rush of embarrassment crept up my neck. “I don’t remember that.”
“I don’t imagine you do. From what I hear, you’ve been through a lot.”
I didn’t respond. I wasn’t certain what to say. I didn’t want to rehash what had happened with my father. Cletus was her brother, so talking to her about him was out of the question. Plus, it hurt to think about Cletus. It hurt to think about how he hadn’t trusted me to choose him. Or maybe he didn’t think I was strong enough to stand up to my parents and put us first. Maybe he still felt sorry for me. And that thought hurt most of all.
I didn’t want his pity. I didn’t want him seeing me as weak or feeble. I wasn’t.
“I can hear you thinking,” Ashley said, her eyes on my feet. “You might as well talk about it. I’m a trained healthcare professional and I guarantee you I’ve heard more hair-raising stories than the bartender at the Pink Pony.”
I studied her, watching her concentrate with steady hands. How she spoke reminded me a lot of Cletus. She was very matter-of-fact, but with a softer touch.
I cleared my throat and glanced at the ceiling. “How do you prove to someone that you’re strong?”
“Through your actions,” she answered without hesitating.
The room descended into silence for a full minute while I thought about her response. A plan developed, one where I would prove to Cletus I was strong, that he could trust me, that we were equals. And the more I thought my plan over, the more I realized that this plan wasn’t really about proving anything to Cletus. This plan was about proving something to myself.
Ashley broke the silence. “Now, if that someone is Cletus Winston . . .” Her eyes lifted and our gazes connected. “Then may I suggest you add a little sneaky in with the recipe? Because, as much as I love my brother—and I do, don’t tell anyone, but he’s my favorite—he needs a taste of his own medicine every once in a while. So if you can think of a way to prove your strength and pull one over on the puppet master at the same time, just let me know how I can help.”
I stared at Ashley, unable to speak. Some overpowering emotion held me in its grip and I couldn’t quite untangle myself.
Just let me know how I can help.
Her gaze flickered to mine, then back to my feet. “Are you okay? You’re looking at me like I’m a loony bird.”
“No. Sorry. It’s just . . .” I struggled to find the correct words. “It’s just, I don’t think anyone has ever said that to me before.”
“What? That Cletus needs a taste of his own medicine?”
“No, ‘let me know how I can help.’”
Ashley’s movements stilled, and her frown of concentration became something else. After several contemplative seconds, she lifted her eyes to my face and gave me small smile.
“You know, I just moved back—back to town—last spring and I’ve been missing my gal pals. I Skype with them every Tuesday, but I miss having good girl friends to go places with. I haven’t taken the time I should to build a new tribe here in Green Valley.”