His fingers, so gentle before, became firmer, more forceful as he stroked her pussy. He split her labial lips and dipped inside.
“That’s where my cock wants to be, love. It wants to be right there on the precipice, waiting to delve inside.” He stroked around her entry, making long, slow circles, drawing out her arousal. “Can you feel it?”
She gasped as a single finger stroked inside. She’d had actual real sex but nothing so erotic. Lee had been right. She’d used sex in an attempt to gain love and affection, but now what she really wanted was sex. Dirty. Nasty. Filthy sex.
She wanted to ride that finger and see where it took her. Her hips seemed to move of their own accord as though they were magnetically attracted to his hand.
“Who’s in charge of this?” Lee asked, his mouth against her ear. Warm breath covered her skin, making her shiver and want more.
She didn’t even think. Her whole brain was focused and centered on that finger. He’d put the image in her mind. His cock. Hard male flesh. His finger massaged all around her pussy, but she wanted more. She needed to get it inside. “You are. You’re in charge.”
The words pushed out, but she didn’t care. All she cared about was getting that finger deep inside and finally knowing what all the fuss was about. She’d read novels and seen movies where sex seemed to be the end all be all of existence, but she’d never had a glimmer of understanding until now. She pushed her hips down, trying to trap him, to force him to shove his finger deep.
She nearly cried out when he withdrew that finger completely.
“I’m glad you agree, love. Now hop up and take off the rest of your clothes. I want to see you.”
She blinked a couple of times before she processed what he was saying. “But I was so close.”
A sexy little smile curled his lips up. “No you weren’t, but you will be. Avery, trust me. I’ll give you what you need. Now give me what I need. I need to see you.”
He wasn’t seeing enough of her? Her pussy was out for him to see. Why did he have to push it? Most men would have just shoved her skirt up and had their way with her, but no, Lee Donnelly had to make a huge production number out of it.
Because it was important. Because sex should have meaning beyond having an orgasm and falling asleep. Because he took it seriously.
She finally figured it out. Yes, he was looking for pleasure, but beyond that he was looking for something more. He was looking for a connection. He was looking for trust and honesty, and she wanted all those things, too. This whole night could have been a forgettable and likely regrettable fling, but Lee seemed intent on teaching her something. That she mattered. That what she wanted mattered, and she shouldn’t accept less so she had to take what he wanted just as seriously.
“Talk to me, Avery.” Serious green eyes pinned her. He wouldn’t let her get away with anything, and that suddenly seemed sexy to her.
“I’m afraid when I take my clothes off that you won’t want me anymore.”
He groaned and put his forehead to hers. “Damn it, baby. We have a lot of work to do. You were in an accident, and you’re worried I won’t like the scars, right?”
“Yes, though they mostly faded. I’m also worried about how big I am. I’m not pencil thin, and my breasts sag. I have stretch marks.” She hadn’t really thought about those. They told a story, those stretch marks and the way her breasts hung, and he wouldn’t be able to avoid the C-section scar that split her body in a curve above her pelvic bone. Would he ask? Would he know what it meant? Would it mean a thing if she didn’t tell him? “I had a baby when I was eighteen.”
She hadn’t told anyone about Maddie. Thomas had only found out because he’d run a background check on her before she was hired. She’d kept that part of her life utterly secret, but sitting on his lap with her body warm and his arms around her, it seemed wrong to withhold it. That was what she was doing, she suddenly realized. She was withholding. She was using the knowledge like a wall to keep herself safe. No one had to know the real Avery Charles and then no one could really hurt her, but suddenly it also seemed like no one could really connect with her, either. No one could love her.
His face softened. “What happened? Was it the accident?”
Those hands, so dominant and intent the moment before, now stroked and pulled her close. He was fluid in his comfort, moving from predatory sexual male to protective and open in an instant. He’d said he would give her what she needed. And what he seemed to need was her trust. “I don’t want to talk about it tonight, Lee. Please. I’m not trying to shut you out. I just don’t want tonight to be about the past.”